Oh, my stars and garters!

Style points

It's raining and raining for the first time in over a month. It's been raining for an hour. My plants are sated; my rainbarrel overfloweth.

I was at a party last night where the talk somehow turned to bras, and I learned for the first time that some women hook them in front, scootch them around to their proper position, and then thread their arms through.

I was gobsmacked, and also hornswoggled, because I had never heard of this technique before. I always just put my arms through and hook mine in back. I really was surprised to learn about the other way, although don't know why I was quite so shocked.  Hooking it in front is a perfectly reasonable way to do it, and I'll keep it in mind if I ever have trouble getting my arms behind my back. Although it seems like it's a few extra steps, and don't the bras get stretched out more quickly that way?

Any other secrets you ladies have been keeping? Clearly, I haven't spent a lot of time in locker rooms, which I'm perfectly okay with.

Oh, crap!

I forgot to learn how to paint. Well, I'll figure something out.

Summer of perpetual snacking

It's too hot to be screwing around in the kitchen and we're trying not to eat out very much, so I am in a deep and seemingly inescapable food rut. Still, there are a few things that always taste good to me lately:

Boar's Head cajun-smoked turkey. It's spicy and roasted so well it's almost like jerky, but it's still plenty tender for sandwiches.

Eric's breadmaker bread. He's finally figured out the salt/water ratio, and the loaves strike a good balance between dense and fluffy. It has a good flavor on their own but doesn't overpower any sandwich you'd like to make with it.

Wyler's Italian Ices. Katherine left a box of these in the freezer for us last week, and they lean much more toward the good fruity than the icky corn syrupy.

Cherries and blueberries. Cheap, ripe, and plentiful this month. So what if I always eat too many and  therefore occasionally have to worry about things like shitting my pants when I get stuck in traffic on the upper deck?

San Pellegrino Limonata. The bottles are round and squat and are pleasing to look at and hold. It's good on its own, it's good with vodka, and it's really, really good with vodka that's been steeped with Earl Grey tea. I got the recipe here. Go make some right now or you will not be nearly as happy as you could be. The Central Market Sicilian lemon soda isn't half-bad either.

I think that's it. Oh! Except for:

Beer.

Cheese.

Great, I'm hungry again. What else is awesome right now that I'm missing out on?

Wooing

Vickie has owls in the backyard of her new house too. Eric has nearly perfected the screech owl call--more of a pulsing whistle than a screech--and actually held a conversation with one last night. I wish we knew what they were saying to each other. Could be an invitation to mate, could be a series of escalating threats. Yooohooo! Come here, big boy! No, you come here, pal, so I can rip your beak off and shove it in your auricular orifice. I guess it always could be both: I'll fuck you...TO DEATH. Either way, no one's moved into the owl house yet. At least it looks nice up there.

Art is hard

I have a week and three days to finish one thing and start and finish three other things. I think I can finish. I already know exactly what I want to do and what I need to do in order to do it, but I am a little dismayed that my procrastination is still in full force and effect. I mean, if you have a lot of stuff to do, the obvious course of action is to spend the evening going to see a movie* and drinking beer, right?

*Iron Man. It was fun to watch from moment to moment but a little thin and draggy. Ultimately I wish I'd seen something better to break my seven-month streak of no movie watching/justify not doing what I'm supposed to be doing.

Stupid joke

Q: Why do communists drink decaf Earl Grey?

A: Because proper tea is theft.

Real parade

Tubas are very photogenic. The Houston All-Star Band is fantastic. I was relieved the kids weren't in full uniforms in the heat because we never would have gotten away with that in high school. Our band director would have said something dry and cryptic like "greatness has to faint sometimes" and leave us to struggle into our polyester prisons.

I think there should be a marching band parade through every neighborhood every Friday evening. Really, there's no way you can hear dozens of really loud drums slowly getting closer up the street and not feel all stirred up. Then the bands pass by, everyone cheers, the motorcycle cops bring up the rear and clear out, the traffic starts to flow again, and there's a whole weekend ahead.

Trees. Tubas.

After Eric and I had the tree taken out last week, I was talking to my officemate about how we were thinking of replacing it, and he said he thought it would be cool to plant and grow a tree.

I told him about the tiny oak seedling that was in the front flowerbed when I was in fifth grade. My mom said it couldn't stay there, but let us pull it up and plant it in the backyard. Here it is today; I took a picture of it when I was visiting my dad and stepmom last weekend. It dwarfs the house and shades the yard, and dammit, my family made a tree happen.

Hey! If you missed the parade a few weeks ago, or loved it so so much and want more, there will be marching bands going down Loyola between 183 and Northeast Drive tomorrow--Friday--evening between 6:30 and 7:30. I gather the parade is sort of a pep rally for the annual Juneteenth Battle of the Bands/Drumline Competition on Saturday (at Nelson Field on Berkman--I'm having a hard time finding a definitive link to this year's, but it's on for sure).

I went to the main event a few years ago and was blown away, but I don't think I can spare an afternoon this weekend. Still, I plan to wander down and watch the bands march by tomorrow, and if you live anywhere near there, you should too. They are awesome. 

YARRRzzzzz

Watching TV with one eye makes me really tired. No depth perception superpower yet, but maybe I'll get eight hours of sleep tonight, which is miracle enough.

Friendly Friends Funciferous Something Else That Starts With 'F'

There is another group art show in the works. It's on July 5th at End of an Ear again.

We were hoping to come up with something to top the photo wall, but after three years it became pretty apparent that wasn't going to happen. So we're just going to put up some stuff that's representative of what everyone's been doing lately, make some snacks, get a keg, and hope people will show up. (You will, won't you?)

I have to admit that if I put up stuff that's representative of what I've been doing lately, I'd have to either settle for a blank wall or a performance piece that featured me sitting around in the store staring blankly at my laptop, drinking beer, and sweating in the dark because it's been 100 degrees almost every day since mid-May and the only way I can feel okay about running the AC even at 78 or 79 is if we keep everything else shut off as much as possible; our house is not very efficient.

I would take breaks during the piece to eat slices of cheese right out of the package and sprawl on the couch crabbing about how bored and tired I am. (Don't forget that you're not supposed to clap between movements, no matter how impressed you are!) For the finale I would roll around on the floor playing with the cats.

That would be the accurate and honest way to go. But as a blank wall would be an embarrassing admission (this isn't?) and I'm afraid the cats would run away if I tried to incorporate them into a public performance, I'm having to sit down at my desk and actually make things this month. This has has been good for me. So good, in fact, that it's actually making me feel more pathetic than I did before.

Anyway. Eric and I had everyone over tonight for dinner and a quick discussion about times and refreshments and publicity. I always forget how fun it is to work on things in a group, and I'm really looking forward to having to work like crazy to pull all this together in two weeks. So long as it doesn't interfere with my precious staring passively at the internet and playing with the cats time, of course.

Back tomorrow

I've been busy, mostly with visiting nice people I don't get to see very often.

I can haz mutton pie?

I think catblogging was inevitable.   (pdf link)

Advice

It's interesting to watch the seating dynamics at a big meeting. People try to arrange themselves to be inconspicuous as possible and also try to be inconspicuous about their inconspicuousness, which is funny because that never really works. My strategy sure didn't. I stupidly followed someone into the back row. The back row's good, right? It's all the way in the back!

No, not when things shake out so that you end up right in the middle. Not when everyone else is smarter than you and avoids the middle like the chairs there have been dusted with SARS, leaving an obvious gaping hole all the way down. Then you will be against the wall, behind five or six empty chairs and directly in the line of sight.

If you have to go to a meeting with a big group, I suggest you dawdle a little so you can be toward the end of one of the middle rows. And that is the only career advice I have, except that if you wear a T-shirt with a skirt to work, you can say it's a "knit shirt" so long as it's not too ratty.

And the winner is...

Pure

I am wearing a brand-new white shirt today. Anyone care to guess what time I spill something on it? The person who guesses the closest by midnight tonight wins a prize!

Noisy

Photo by krotpong!

The parade was a little raggedy but fun. All the former band kids agreed that it's great to stomp around in ugly, sweaty uniforms making a bunch of noise again, at least every once in a while.

We had a tree cut down today in the front yard. Ordinarily I would be sad about losing a tree, but it became apparent this one was sick shortly after we moved in last year. This spring all the top branches died and the trunk started simultaneously rotting and sprouting leaves. It was ugly and starting to lean ominously toward the house, so it had to go away.

Timber!

It made a fantastic clatter when it fell. Sorry things didn't work out for you, Mr. Ash Tree. Maybe we'll plant a nice redbud in your honor.

Also, we tried another pool today. I can bike to it after work! It costs $3 to get in, but it's one of the bigger, nicer city pools. There is a free neighborhood pool around the corner from my house, but it keeps weird hours, has no lap lanes, and is always literally churning with kids. Which reminds me that I need to get to Deep Eddy soon. And Hamilton Pool. And the lake. And the river. And the ocean.

And, uh, the shower. Dang! I reek of sunscreen and bug spray.   

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII love a parade.

It's parade time again! This time it's a mermaid parade that culminates in a carnival/benefit for the Coney Island Preservation Society. It starts around 5:30 this evening at the Rio Rita if you want to see my dork ass marching around with a clarinet and hopefully a bunch of people in mermaid costumes.

I don't know much about the carnival and won't be there as I have to leave for Houston immediately after, but my friend Chad says it'll be fun, and he's smart like that.

Parade route:

View Larger Map

Hunt

We've been having these creepy, strong hot winds all week, and they seem to be depriving me of some sort of essential life force or something. I am completely wiped out, despite not having done anything taxing all week. Well, I did go to the mall today, and that is enervating enough, I suppose.

Say, does anyone know where to get some cute short-sleeved blouses that are made of sturdy but light cotton and are slightly tailored--generous in the hips and not too big in the bust, please--with no or at least not very puffed sleeves, gathers, or ruffles within six feet of the garment? (I am not opposed to ruffles and gathers on principle. They probably look great on you! Also, I've been meaning to tell you that haircut is really cute. Did you get highlights? Oh, that's your natural color? Lucky! But ruffles and gathers tend to make me look sort of blowsy . Or slatternly, maybe? They don't suit me, at any rate.) Oh, and preferably these shirts would be under $30, but I would pay more if they were perfect. That's not too much to ask, is it? I know they're out there somewhere. I just don't have the energy to search right now. Not that you have nothing better to do than shop for me, of course. But if you run across one in your travels, you'll tell me about it, won't you?

Presenting Sweetloaf

Yeah, it's a dumb name, almost painfully dumb, but you know, he's not the smartest cat, either. I swear it's the only name that fit such a pretty, friendly, dopey cat, and I was already calling him Loafy. Plus the name cracks me up.

Anyway, it's too late now. The vet came by today, and "Sweetloaf" is on his permanent record now.

Thanks to everyone who suggested names or gave new-cat advice. He's getting over his shelter cold and is much more comfortable and playful now. He's also slowly making friends with Stinky. It's awfully cute when they boop noses as they pass each other in the hall. And aww, look, he's taking a gigantic dump in the box as I type! Who's a good Sweetloaf? Whoizzit?

Doctor's orders: Dress up like a pirate and watch TV.

No, seriously! I'm supposed to wear this patch over my good eye while I watch TV for thirty minutes three times a week to strengthen my lazy one.

I used to wear a patch when I was a little kid, and oh, god, I hated it. I couldn't see and it was sweaty and the adhesive smelled weird and of course the other kids pounced on it like jackals on an impala carcass. There was much crying and fighting about it at home, and I always took it off as soon as I got to school. I think everyone was relieved when we were finally told to stop because the eye wasn't going to get any better. Poor dumb lazy eye; who was I to blame it for wasting its potential and refusing to apply itself?

I didn't think it was treatable this late in life, but my eye doctor insists it will help at least a little. So I'll try the patch thing again in the privacy of my living room. Because while I am no worse off from just relying on the one eye all these years, depth perception seems to me like an unattainable amazing superpower. If I can score a superpower by doing nothing more than sitting on my ass squinting at The Simpsons for 90 minutes a week, I'm totally game.

Yard

It's starting to look like a real yard out back, except that the grass is already dying. I hate watering the grass. It seems insanely wasteful. Let's pave over it and paint it green!

Our pathetic square foot garden. Our yard doesn't get enough light; we haven't even bothered to plant the tomatoes. Are there any summer vegetables that are delicious and like partial shade?

The screech owl house! My favorite tree is also the most advantageously located for owls, so we stuck it up there. I hear them every night lately, so I hope they'll come check it out.

The deck, with the stencil Wain made for our birthdays.

Closeup of the stencil. Wain's been doing some really good things with spray paint these days. I wish I had a new medium to be all excited about, but for now I will just enjoy Wain's new obsession.