I put up a hummingbird feeder last weekend. It was more out of a desire to add a little color to our very-pale-aqua porch with matching very-pale-aqua trim than any altruistic bird-loving impulse. But goddamn if they didn't show up.
At first there was just one little hummingbird who would feed at length and leisure. He or she was so fearless that Thursday morning it hovered right in front of me at eye level, so close that I held my breath for several seconds and then blew gently in its face. I was afraid it might land on my head or go for my eyes, that's how calm and close it was. It was sweet and kind of exciting.
Then, this weekend, a few more hummingbirds moved in.
At first I was glad, but now nobody's really eating. They're mostly just dive-bombing the feeder and pecking each other and breaking away while twittering angrily at each other. It's kind of funny and kind of terrible.
I read up on it and learned that hummingbirds are very territorial. Also they starve to death easily because they expend so much energy just trying to get their food. What if they starve to death while fighting over the feeder that I ostensibly put up for their benefit?
It turns out I'm probably going to have to buy, fill, and install a new one. What has started out as an innocent attempt to add a splash of color and a few cute little birdies to my porch has become a grave responsibility: to keep them from either dropping dead of exhaustion or killing each other in a hummingbird sugar-water death match. So what I want to know is how does every little thing get so goddamn complicated?