Work today has been incredibly taxing. First I counted 400 address labels. Then I flipped some pages. So if you have any pages that need flipping, or 400 of something that needs to be counted, let me know. Because I'm here to tell you I can flip and count the shit out of some shit. Meanwhile, my college diploma hangs on the wall across from my bed, beautifully framed and silently mocking me every morning when I wake up.
I woke up to something else unpleasant today: a thumbtack in my pants. It was horribly confusing and disturbing. Then I remembered that as I was dropping off to sleep last night, I noticed one of the tacks I use to keep my bedroom curtain up (I am nothing if not classy; educated and classy) had fallen down. I remember thinking, Oh, that's bad, I should really nnnngh right before I passed out. I guess it landed in my bed. But no harm done, other than the slight emotional scarring that accompanies waking up to the presence of sharp foreign objects in one's pajamas. I'm still not totally sure how that tack worked its way in there, but life is full of mysteries, stupid or otherwise.