A few things

• The nose flutes are supposed to arrive tonight. Unfortunately, I'll be at work when they hit my porch. After "Happy Birthday," I think I'd like everyone to learn "Thunder and Blazes" (MP3 link via euchronia.net to what's also known as the “doot-doot-doodle-oodle oot doot do do” circus song) and "Debaser" by the Pixies. I have no idea how to organize a nose flute gang, but I'm sure it will all come together effortlessly.

• I learned how to make the perfect fried egg last night. It really works. This is a great achievement, as I love fried egg sandwiches but until now have only been able to produce scorched, rubbery, raw-yolked ovals of waste, disappointment, and failure.

• The wood chipper is still on my street. I have grown numb to it.