I have to buy a dress this weekend to wear to a wedding later this month. I haven't bought a dress (except for the wedding-inappropriate pink one, which I still haven't worn) in about six years. As a result, I have no idea what kind of dress would fit or even suit me. And, to make matters worse, I don't really have a good shape for dresses. My body rejects dresses as if they were transplant gorilla hearts. Dresses just sort of sit on my frame, flopping and bunching and riding and pinching. This is not self-conscious girly whining, either. This is empirical fact based on simple geometry.
My attitude sucks from the get-go, I know, but I can tell you with absolute certainty that this is going to suck balls.
I'm scared.